One.

  1. Reclaim female dignity in a culture gone terribly wrong.The portrayal of women in the media should be causing women extreme alarm, yet instead of demanding a healthier, respectable image, females have implicated themselves in the process of objectification. With the constant barrage of degrading stereotypes present in film, books, television, magazines, pornography, etc. the state of things today certainly begs the question, “Was the trade from prize on a pedestal to object in the gutter really worth it?” Women have gleefully accepted representations of themselves of gold-digging whores (IE, the contestants on The Bachelor and Who Wants to Marry a Millionaire?), publicity-seeking sluts who will do anything for attention (Girls Gone Wild, anyone?), dumb blondes and brainless bimbos(Jessica Simpson and Paris Hilton- who, coincidentally, also falls into the category of “publicity seeking slut), and bitches who will scratch and claw their way to the top, be it for power or money (such as on “The Apprentice,” who also, “became “publicity-seeking sluts” when they posed in their panties for FHM) Pornography, which many feminists aren’t fundamentally opposed to, but as is, is completely phallocentric and almost never representative of female desires. The focus is always on the money shot, the penetration, the fellatio. The fake orgasms are blatantly apparent to most females, many of whom find the fake-ness of the sex to be humorous, but are willing to put on such a show themselves to feel “empowered”. To re-enforce the notion that a female’s value lies only in her body, any trip to the grocery store will uncover an entire world of magazines that always say the same thing, “How to Look Sexy For Less!” “50 Ways to Please Your Man” “What He Really Wants is a Dirty Girl” “Lose Weight Fast!” and, of course, “How Jessica Stopped Being ‘Fat’” (meaning: “that average, healthy weight”sort of fat.) Ten-year-old girls are wearing sexy lingerie and panties that say things like ”Eye Candy.”The inability of women to admit that no, this is not sexual liberation; this is a game of power and perceived power, a way of trying to feel validated through male attention- seems mind-boggling to me. Can women actually believe that in a world where we are free, we don’t care about actual sexual enjoyment or satisfaction? We measure sex by times that end with male ejaculation, we tell older men they have to compete by taking medicine if they have to. When the Second Wave of feminists spoke of “free love,” they used a curious combination of words. “Free”-uninhibited, not regulated, not dictated, “Love”- as in, the emotion, the feeling, that humans all need. Now, before you say I’m crazy, I’m not saying that feminists advocated everyone be in a deep, traditional, romantic love. “Love” meant a very basic love of each other simply for existing. An agreement to equality, rooted in mutual trust and respect. This was the notion of a matriarchal society, and it was destined to failure because of a peculiar lack of foresight: the matriarchal values will exist very differently if enacted in a patriarchal culture. The anti-feminine ideal of capitalizing on everything was something feminism wanted to change, but women actually made it worse by providing the system with the perfect thing to capitalize on, at the right time- their bodies. We have a terrible mess to clean up in making women see that they are not sexually liberated, their enslavement has enclosed from the space of the home right into enslavement within her own body. Not only must we promote a realistic and healthy body acceptance, but we must change the notions that keep women believing that making out with other women and having sex for “notches on their belt” is anything BUT objectifying. A woman dancing on a pole at a club isn’t actually seen as a liberated women: she’s seen as another option on the menu. This is something that men are well aware of, which is why so many of them say they’d be horrified if their wife or sister or daughter worked in the sex industry: because women who treat themselves as objects, become objects. Used and used and used and tossed away. Why would you want a woman you love to become an object? The closer a woman is to you, the more likely you are to understand her or see her as a “real person”. In some ways, I feel it’s necessary to acknowledge that some men are very distressed about the predicament women are in, and the men are trying to protect “female” honor. However, they apply these values primarily to their own immediate loved ones but don’t see the harm in doing it to more distant females. Those men who actually are telling females the situation has gotten wildly out of control should be applauded. There are many men who are fighting to restore feminine appreciation of herself back to us, and we should welcome them, because we can’t expect everyone to change at once. It will happen gradually, but once it gets started, it will keep spreading.

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